Monday, June 22, 2009
Posted by -H-

i had i really bad day at work yesterday i messed up everything and was way to slow. Got that was one of those days when everything goes wrong. I am so tired and just want to curl up somewhere and just be. lay there and do nothing. i am feeling some kind of drepressiong goming.

on the happyer note i have fasted now for 24 hours. i had three days of partyes and so much food and so yesterday after breakfast i was like: thats it i am fasting as long as i can go. usually i am terrible at fasting and i dont last more than 20 hours but this time i will make it at least 72 hours.

it is nice and summy outside so i can hit the beach with my friend. i really need some tanning i am withe as a swan at the moment. and hating it.

i have some guy troubles and that is making me miserable. I have this guy, lets call him T. Well me and T have this thing going one for long (some kissing and making out) WE have lots of fun together and i really like him. So the other day i was at his place and well we where making out and well at whan point he asksks me have i had sex. and i was like no.And well i knew he wanted sex but i wasnt shure so he ended up taking me home and well now i am upset at myself. i thing i should have slept with him because i really like hime but i am afraid a bit. god what a mess.
i just cant stop thinking about him and it makes me sad. and i am terryfied that he doesnt like me.
oh and he hastn replay my text message i sent him Yesterday.
i might ask him to come over on wednesday and well i want to talk to him and become his girlgriend but i am so fucking scared that he wont like me. HOW THE HELL I OVERCOME MY FEAR????
i might also sleep with him.

god fucking day, i rent an apartment and the old to much speaking and lecturing owner of the apartment just walked in. i hope she doesent notice me or she will gome over and start babling. god i hate that old bich so much. DONT notice me DONT notice me